I often sit and panic that the next sound I hear from your mouth is an excruciating scream, full of intense and emotion.
And I often fear that I will encounter a situation that ignites chaos and commotion.
I try to say the nicest things and utter words in the kindest way,
So, as best as I can, guarantee that it echoes the values I hold dear – kindness, compassion – just in case it is the last words I ever say.
They teach that all is temporary; the world around us and the thoughts held deep in the most secure parts of our mind.
I never thought I’d be changed the way I’ve changed in this brief experience of time.
There’s this noise you make, reminiscent of the incessant questioning of the swarm of youth I see daily;
A drone, a whine, all words combined into one pitch that resonates boldly on my ear drum and makes me feel quite crazy.
But most of the time, in which I am around you, the noise you make is joyous, pleasant, and delightful.
A hearty laugh, experiencing the world around; as you play with balls, you run around, and meander all insightful.
And despite my solitary nature, my comfort of being alone –
I can’t imagine me without you, my perfect, miraculous son.